Happy Sunday Everyone! Cue the quarter-life crisis because the clock has struck midnight which means I'm now TWENTY FIVE. That's freaking scary because I swear we've skipped a few years at some point. I swear it's only been a couple of years since I graduated high school, not bloody SEVEN. Time is a crazy thing, huh. Anyway, I thought I'd do the totally cliched birthday content of sharing 25 things I've learnt by the age of 25. It's a bit of a random list, but so is everything I've learnt over the past 25 years. 1. WET HAY CATCHES FIRE AS IT DRIES OUT IN A WARM PLACE Yes, this is a weird place to start, but it was literally the first point I wrote down when coming up with this list and I couldn't not include it. The line is actually a quote from the TV series The Saddle Club, from an episode in 2001, in which a stack of hay is left out in the rain, stacked in the stables while wet and then self-combusting, putting people and horses in danger. Of everything from The Saddle Club I don't know why this is the the one thing to have stuck with me for nearly twenty years but it has. It probably doesn't help that I live in a rural community where a number of farmers year in, year out, stack their hay too early when the moisture is too high, resulting in combustion and loss of hay and even hay sheds. So take note people - check the moisture levels of your hay bales before stacking them! 2. YOU DON'T NECESSARILY NEED A LARGE FRIENDSHIP GROUP TO BE HAPPY AND HAVE FUN Just because your group of friends is small, doesn't mean you're having any less fun than people with a large group of friends. Realistically, it's hard to keep close friendships with lots of people - you're better off having 3-5 super close friends and an extended group of friends, than having a large group of friends where you're not that close with any of them. Sure, in high school and university it's easy to keep those large friendship groups, but as we grow up and move in different directions, it can be exhausting trying to keep those tight connections with many people. Stick with having a handful of really close besties and don't focus on the idea of not having enough friends compared to someone else. If you're happy with who you have in your life, that's all that matters. 3. VOLUNTEERING MAKES THE WORLD GO ROUND Without volunteers, most things in our local communities wouldn't exist. Just look at your local sporting clubs, service organisations and event committees - who are the people behind all these things? Yep, volunteers. So put your hand up and get involved. No matter how much time you have to spare, these clubs and organsations will be so grateful to have another pair of hands or brain involved, in whatever capacity you are capable of. Not only do you get that satisfaction of helping people or being involved in putting something together, but you also get to meet a really great group of people you may have otherwise never gotten the chance to connect with. 4. YOU DON'T NEED TO HIT ALL THE MILESTONES BY THE TIME YOU'RE 25 Just because the people you went to highschool with are getting married, having babies, or building houses, and you haven't hit any or some of those milestones yet, doesn't mean you aren't living your life properly. There's no actual timeline for when you're meant to hit these milestones in life, and some people just don't want to hit them anyway. And that's totally fine. As long as you're happy with where you are in life and how you're tracking along in your own journey, then who cares if someone your age (or younger) is already married with their third child on the way and has just moved into their brand new home. Good on them, but also good on you for being wherever you are at too. You do you, no matter what speed that's at. 5. REMOVING TOXIC PEOPLE FROM YOUR LIFE IS THE BEST FEELING Whether it be as simple as unfollowing/unfriending/blocking people on social media or taking the steps to cut them out of life IRL, it's so important to remove that toxic and negative energy from your life. Your mental health will thank you so much for taking that step. And yes, for some people this isn't an easy task, especially when it comes to close friends and family, but if you're in a position to cut ties, then grab the scissors and cut them. It's much better to surround yourself with positive energy and people who bring you up than those always trying to tear you down. You can't jeopardize your mental health for other people. 6. IT'S OKAY IF YOU'VE NOT FIGURED YOUR LIEF OUT YET Hollywood really has us thinking that once we hit our 20s we're going to have our life together and know exactly what we're doing and where we're going. Yep, that's wrong. Sure, some of us have it all figured out from the moment we graduate high school, but most of us won't. And you know what, that's totally fine. Your 20s is all about figuring out where the hell you fit in the world, and with the world around us changing so rapidly, it can be hard to figure it all out. We're going to feel totally lost at times, but that's okay. Everything falls into place eventually and before you know it you'll be laughing at how much you stressed about being lost. So don't worry about taking the long road, with all it's twists, turns, dead ends and road bumps, to get to where you're meant to be. 7. DON'T BE AFRAID TO PURSUE SOMETHING OUT-OF-THE-BOX There's no one way to achieve something. High school education really did drum into us that you only had three options after high school - university, job or apprenticeship - and that your options were limited in terms of what you should pursue. Again, the world around us is rapidly changing, and we have the ability to turn nearly any of our interests and passions into something more than just a hobby. Take your favourite YouTuber or influencer for example - most of these people started out by just sharing their lives online and never expected it to grow into an actual career that presented so many opportunities. Don't let anyone tell you you can't think outside the box - if you're passionate and have a vision of where you want to be, you can work hard to make that dream a reality. 8. ALGEBRA, PYTHAGORAS THEOREM & CALCULUS REALLY DOESN'T PLAY A BIG PART IN YOUR LIFE You know how your maths teacher would constantly tell you that you had to learn algebra, Pythagoras theorem and calculus because you'd need it after high school? Yeah, they're lying. Sure, there are some career paths where you will need to know these things, but in the seven years since graduating, I've never once had to call on these maths skills. And hello, we have Google for when a weird maths problem suddenly pop up. This isn't me telling you to defy your maths teacher and not learn these things, but don't stress too much if you're struggling, especially if you know you aren't going into the likes of engineering and architecture. 9. THE INSTAGRAM? DON'T TRY TO OBTAIN IT That stunning insta life that your favourite influencer showcases? Yeah, that's not something to try and obtain. Firstly, what our favourite influencers and YouTubers post online is only a very small fragment of their life. An edited portion of their life. We don't see the boring & mundane things. We don't see the hardships. You can't be hyperfocused on trying to obtain the Instagram life, because it's just not realistic and it's also not real. This is a message that teens especially need to know, and I think it's important for the rest of us who know and understand this to talk about it more. Secondly, these people have put a lot of hard work in over several years to get to where they are, and they continually work hard, even if we don't automatically see that in the content they post. They make things look super easy when they are anything but. You can't get wrapped up in trying to achieve the life you think they have. 10. IT'S IMPORTANT TO TAKE MENTAL HEALTH BREAKS You have to put you first, so don't feel bad for taking some time for yourself. Whether it be an afternoon, a day, a week, or more, we all need that time to pause and hit reset. Even if you think you don't need a break because your mental health is fine, there's probably a small seed niggling at the back of your mind that will only continue to grow unless you take a break. If you know your mental health is taking a hit, you need to stop and address the situation before things get worse. There's this stigma around mental health, and while things are certainly changing with the times, many people still struggle with taking mental health breaks and telling people they are stepping back from aspects of their life to do so. Just do it. Don't worry about what people will say or think. At the end of the day, the headspace you are in is the most important thing. 11. YOU CAN'T COMPARE TO OR COPY SOMEONE ELSE'S LIFE I've kind of covered this within previous points, but it's still an important point on this list. Who cares how other people are choosing to live their lives - focus on how you're living your own life. Just because someone looks like they have everything and are super happy, doesn't mean that's how they actually feel about their own life. You can't compare your life to others because you don't actually know what they're going through behind closed doors. All that time spent focusing on what other people are doing only takes time away from focusing on yourself. If you're happy with where you're at, then that's all that matters. And if you're not happy, you have to be the one to navigate to a place where you are, and that doesn't involve following the same life path as someone else. 12. ACNE DOESN'T JUST STOP AT 20 AND THAT'S TOTALLY FINE Acne has always been connected with puberty, so we've be conditioned to think that we're only going to have bad skin during our teen years. For some people, this is true, but for a lot of us, we're still going to have breakouts as adults. There's nothing wrong with being an adult with acne. I get hormonal breakouts, I did hate it early on, and yeah it can still suck sometimes, but I'm also fortunate that I don't get severe breakouts like some people. Just figure out a skincare routine or go see a doctor or dermatologist. Again, there is nothing wrong with still having breakouts, and more people need to understand this rather than judging people for the state of their skin. Acne can be a severe struggle for people, so turning around to make them feel bad for still having acne in the 20s is just a dick move. 13. SOMETIMES FAILURE TEACHES YOU THE GREATEST LESSON The fear of failure is drummed into us from an early age and it's such a damaging thing. There is nothing wrong with failing, and we shouldn't be stressing about the prospect of failure. Sure, it's going to bum you out, especially if you've worked hard at something and it hasn't worked out, but it's all about getting back up, dusting off you butt and trying again. If it's meant to be, we will get there eventually. And if it's not meant to be, our failure will bring new lessons and opportunities. Of course, don't just aspire to be a failure, but don't worry about the possibility of failure. 14. YOU CAN'T LET INTERNET TROLLS GET YOU DOWN It's so easy for a comment or DM to get you down. But internet trolls should not have that power over you. They don't know you from a bar of soap. And most wouldn't be saying what they do if they weren't hiding behind the security of their keyboard. Don't give them the satisfaction of getting to you. Delete. Report. Block. Forget. What kind of lives do these people live if they spend their days harassing random people on the internet? Remove them from your life and move on with living your best life. 15. GROWING APART FROM FRIENDS, FAMILY & INTERESTS IS NATURAL It's a sad fact of life, but sometimes we grow apart from the things we love, whether that be friends, family or interests. It can suck when you look back on what you had with people, but sometimes these things just happen. If they're meant to be in your life, you'll circle back to them in due course. If not, you'll find new people and new interests to fill those voids. By all means fight to keep those things in your life, but realise that some things just aren't meant to be. As we grow up, we learn and change and so it's okay if that means drifting away from people and things we thought would always be there. 16. CREATING SOMETHING IS SUPER REWARDING For those who don't know, back in 2017 I wrote a local history book to celebrate my local agricultural show staging it's 100th Show. I was and am still super proud for what I was able to create - all the research, all the reading, all the writing, all the editing and all the designing resulted in something pretty damn cool that people were excited to get their hands on. That's a really weird feeling! It's not just creating big stuff like a book, but I'm always really excited about some of the blog posts and videos I create. You don't have to be a creative person to create something - just taking the time to cook a nice dinner is rewarding enough. Just create something you find joy in! 17. THERE'S NOTHING LIKE READING A GOOD BOOK I genuinely don't understand how people haven't ready a book since like primary school or high school. Like, I get that being forced to read in school is kinda shit, but reading for leisure? That's freaking amazing. Granted, my book nerd is kind of showing here, but reading is SO enjoyable! There are MILLIONS of books out there spanning hundreds of genres - there is 100% something out there that your are going to absolutely love and devour. So if you've not picked up a book since high school, definitely consider picking one up before the year is out. 18. YOU CAN'T TAKE GRANDPARENTS FOR GRANTED At 25, I still have two of my grandparents, although it's pretty much one grandparent since my Nan has Alzheimer's and no longer remembers anyone and can't string more than a couple of words together on a good day. It fucking sucks. And it makes me realise how much I took them for granted growing up. Don't take them for granted, or your parents. Time is whizzing passed us so freaking fast these days - take a moment to hold onto those you love and realise how lucky you are to still have them present in your life. 19. WE'RE SURVIVING A GLOBAL PANDEMIC - WE CAN GET THROUGH ALMOST ANYTHING 2020 has certainly tested us all. And while it's definitely been a real struggle at times, it really helps put things into perspective - if we can get through a freaking global pandemic, we can really get through anything. And let's face it, this is the type of positive thinking we all need right now. So pause for a second a breathe, knowing how far you've come this year already, how much you've already had to endure, and know that you can kick butt with whatever lay on the horizon. 20. THOSE MAILING LISTS YOU SIGNED YOUR EMAIL UP TO? UNSUBSCRIBE FROM THEM Let's face it, we do not need to be subscribed to so many damn mailing lists that constantly fill up our inboxes. We are never going to read or buy anything, and I guarantee most of us just delete the emails without evening opening them. Why did you even sign up to that one website five years ago that you never bought anything from and haven't looked at since? Just unsubscribe and clear the email clutter. I can't imagine what it's like for people who never clean up their emails and constantly have the notification bubble on their phone. You guys scare me - how can you live with the little red bubble sitting there all the time? 21. YA NOVELS AREN'T JUST FOR YOUNG ADULTS There is such a stigma around adults who read Young Adult novels and there really shouldn't be. The only thing that makes a YA book YA is the fact that the characters are teenagers. There are some AMAZING YA books out there that deserve to be read by as many people as possible, no matter their age. There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with being an adult who enjoys dipping into the world of YA, or even Middle Grade, just the same as a teenager enjoying New Adult and Adult novels. Your age does not define what books you can and can't read. 22. YOU'VE GOTTA LOWER YOUR EXPECTATIONS We put so many things up on a high pedestal and are disappointed when they don't turn out exactly how we imagined or are a bit anticlimactic. If we put high expectations on things, there's not that chance for things to be better than expected. I'm not saying we put the lowest of low expectations on things, but keeping your expectations in the mid-range means there's every opportunity for things to exceed those expectations. And that's certainly much better than always feeling a little disappointed because something didn't measure up to your expectations. 23. YOU CAN'T JUST LET YOUR PARENT'S VIEWS AUTOMATICALLY BE YOURS It's only natural that the beliefs and views of our parents (or grandparents/guardians) are ones that we initially take as our own as we're growing up. But you can't just keep going through life with those beliefs and views, unless you've taken to time to actually look around the world as see what other viewpoints are out there. I can guarantee that a lot of the views held by our parents are a tad outdated, and while I still agree with my parents on certain things, I've definitely developed my own opinions on things that differ from theirs. And that's totally fine. We have to become our own person, with our own beliefs and views, and for many that will mean going against everything their parent's raised them to believe. 24. NOTHING BEATS LEARNING TO ACTUALLY COOK AND BAKE Now, I'm not a master chef or baker, but I do know my way around the kitchen. And I really have my mum to thank for that. She's always been a strong advocate for baking from scratch - packet mixes are not allowed in the house. And while my parents have never been super experimental or creative with cooking for dinner - I grew up on meat and three veg - we never ate out heaps or had takeout regularly or even ate pre-made frozen/microwave meals. They cooked everything, so I grew up learning how to cook. And while I know I'm fortunate in that regard, I also know that being able to cook and bake from scratch is such a great skill to have and is something best learnt before moving out of home. 25. A REUSABLE DRINK BOTTLE IS ONE OF THE BEST INVESTMENTS YOU CAN MAKE Yeah, there's the whole "saving the planet" thing and "saving money because you're not constantly buying one-use bottles of water" thing, but there's also the "making you drink more water" thing as well. I'm at the point where I use a drink bottle in my own house rather than drinking glasses. I don't know where I'd be without my reusable drink bottle, but I can tell you I wouldn't be as hydrated! If you've been living under a rock and haven't bought one yet, order one on Amazon right now (I also recommend a metal one for keeping your drinks nice and cold)! And there you have it - 25 things I've learnt before turning 25! There's definitely other things that could have been added to the list, and probably many more that I didn't even think of - I'll save them for my 'Thirty Things I've Learnt By 30' post in five years time. No doubt it won't be long before it rolls around, which is scary to think about.
Before I sign off and go enjoy some birthday cake, head over to my other blog, Just Me & My Books, to check out my newest blog post, '25 Book Recommendations | Birthday 2020'. Every year since turning 21 I've compiled a list of book recommendations for my birthday, with the number corresponding to how old I'm turning. It's a tradition that is slowly getting our of hand, but I love it nonetheless! See You Soon! Victoria :) |
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